September 2010 | Love146.org

27
Sep

Love Until it Hurts Posted by Marilyn de Guehery

"I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love."

Mother Teresa

900 Miles. On Bikes.

You read right. Eight hoosiers (aka Indiana locals) are riding from Indianapolis to New York City, and they're on the road as I type somewhere in western Pennsylvania. These eight people weren't cyclists. They're ordinary people who are taking their call as abolitionists to an extraordinary level. Why? While they are doing it to get your attention and raise money, their purposes go much deeper. I've copied these entries from their blog, "To Freedom, For Freedom." This is why they're riding. In their own words...

RIDER: Lindsey Hein
"146. Picture a child with that number pinned on her shirt. That is what she is to the man that walks in the door to purchase her for the hour or maybe the night. Does that make you sick? What if this little girl was your daughter? Fathers, get angry. This is a tragic reality to children who are no different from your own daughters.

Sometimes when I think about this horrible injustice that goes on all over the world, the easiest thing to do is push it aside and go about my happy little life. It is so profoundly sad what these little girls are enduring. It hurts if you go to the place in your heart that is deep enough to honestly disrupt your life. But is it worth it to go there? It's sick how easy it is to block this mess out of my mind and think I am just one person and I can't do big things. I won't do that though- I can't. It's not fair. These little girls deserve the happy, safe, carefree childhood that I had. These little girls deserve to ride bikes, play soccer, climb on monkey bars and play tag.

They deserve to curl up on their dad's lap at night and fall asleep feeling safe. Picture your favorite childhood memory and take that away. That's not ok.
I am riding my bike from Indianapolis to New York with some amazing friends in hopes to raise awareness for this issue. I don't even feel right calling it an issue to be honest... it's more than an issue it is a disgusting reality.

I do not enjoy riding my bike much. I like the idea of riding. I like the idea of saying I can ride my bike all the way to New York. In all reality though, I am a runner. I love running, I am good at running and most of all I enjoy it... so naturally I could run a few marathons and raise awareness for Love 146. That would not challenge me though. I'm going to run the marathons either way. I am not however going to ride my bike to New York either way. So when I am riding on the fifth day of our trip, hating the way my body feels, I'm not going to think of my pain or what I feel at that moment. I am going to think about a little girl who deserves the same childhood I had. She deserves to be free. I'm not riding for me. I'm riding for her."

RIDER: Adam Bocik
I am a musician. I am a husband. I am a student. I am an entrepreneur. I am an activist. I am not a cyclist.

Don't get me wrong; I enjoy a leisurely ride in the woods, but the thought of a 7 mile bike ride to work on regular roads with cars and trucks and people looking out their windows thinking, "He must have gotten a DUI," just isn't that appealing to me. Needless to say, riding a bicycle to New York City was not my first option for two weeks of vacation time this year.
As my wife and I's passion for human rights and social justice has grown over the past few years though, we decided we wanted to do something practical and tangible this year. As we began to discuss possible options, the idea to do this ride was presented, and we agreed; this was it. Despite the dread I may feel when I think about how my butt is going to feel after riding 6 to 8 hours, 7 days consecutively, I cannot help but compare my mild and temporary discomfort to the horrible and grotesque realities that face millions of women and children around the world every day. Upon which I realize, there is no comparison.
So, I will be... a cyclist.

RIDER: Amanda Bocik
When I was first awakened by the reality of young children and women being sold into slavery for sex, I was utterly disturbed and broken. I weeped. I had no idea these kind of crimes were happening today. I became very passionate about the rescue and restoration of these victims.
When the idea came to ride from Monument Circle in downtown Indianapolis, Indiana to the Statue of Liberty in New York City to raise awareness and support for this cause, I thought about how crazy it seemed to do it. Then one day, as I was reflecting on this adventure, a picture came to my mind. It was an image of a stranger carrying the burden of a broken and beaten being. It was beautiful.
Suddenly, I was filled with the realization that this is why I must ride. These children have been abused, broken, and exploited. This ride is my way of trying to carry some of their burden. I am a stranger and at times I have questioned my sanity, my ability, and my purpose to take on such a monumental task as this 900+ mile ride. Then I remember their faces - their numbers. This is why I ride to the symbol of freedom, for freedom.

RIDER: Kaylin Linnemann
27 Million people cannot ride their bikes to freedom; but I can.  27 Million people cannot bring awareness to the fastest growing crime in the world; but I can.    I first heard about human trafficking two years ago in a world affairs class at the Fashion Institute of Technology. A few months later I was invited to see a film called “Call and Response.” The film is based on a technique used in African music known as call and response. Call and response was so critical to the African slave trade because it involved the audience. The vision of “Call and Response” is to place the call out to the audience with hopes of rallying a response to modern day slavery that creates a bottom-up movement. I am responding to the call on September 24, 2010 by riding my bike from Indianapolis, Indiana to New York City and the Statue of Liberty in order to raise money and awareness for Love 146 and the issue of child exploitation…. to freedom, for freedom.

Shout out and thanks to the others on this team, Cary Teeple, Debi Teeple, Glenn Hein, Brooke Trindle, Greg Anderson, & Lori Anderson.

Closing in the words of one of my new heroines, Lindsey Hein,

"This is real. Be moved and be one more person who fights for the freedom of these beautiful girls."

Inspired and Grateful,

Marilyn

ps: If this has inspired you as well and you'd like to support the To Freedom For Freedom ride, you can donate here.

16
Sep

It's Not My Fault - Part 1 Posted by Lamont Hiebert

This blog will make far more sense after you watch this music video. (This is a side project of mine and is not an official Love146 video but it touches on some of the things we deal with as an organization. If you are a survivor of any form of abuse or exploitation this is especially for you.)

I remember the first time I heard the lie. My friend’s parents got divorced when he was in elementary school. He figured it was his fault. Tragically, I have heard that same false notion of self-blame far too many times since then. Here are a few examples:

When Joanne was 7, a baby sitter molested her.
She assumed it was her fault.

Erin was date raped at age 13 by an older boy.
She thought she deserved it.

Throughout John’s childhood, his father took out his frustrations on him through regular beatings.
He too felt that it was his fault.

Kristi blamed herself for the physical and verbal abuse
she suffered from her high school boyfriend.

Staci thought it was her fault for being trafficked and forced
into commercial sexual exploitation at age 16.

After being abducted at age 11 and forced to kill innocent people,
Abejide told me that he struggled with the memories and
overwhelming guilt from being a child soldier.

(The names used above are pseudonyms)

Although I am a Co-Founder and US Prevention Director for Love146 – an organization working to end child sex slavery and exploitation – I long for survivors of every kind to be successful in the restoration process. Unfortunately, one of the greatest challenges we survivors face is the lie of self-blame. But overcoming it is possible!

If you are a survivor I made this for you. And I made it for those who are still being abused or exploited. (If you have information about suspected abuse or exploitation you can find ways to report it at www.itsnotmyfault.org.)

The most common phrase I am hearing from survivors who have watched this video is, “I wish I saw this when I was young.” If you would like to join me in empowering young victims to find help and survivors to overcome the lie of self-blame, please send these links to your contacts/networks (especially to young people.) http://bit.ly/9n8AQK and www.itsnotmyfault.org

Restoration!

Lamont

Lamont Hiebert's blog

10
Sep

What comes next? Activism after the demise of Craigslist’s “Adult Services” Posted by Kathy Maskell

What a week for the CEO and staff at Craigslist! First a threatening letter from the U.S. Attorneys General, then the placement of an ominous "CENSORED" bar over the Adult Services section of their website, and now the complete removal of the Adult Services section (only in the U.S.-- erotic/adult services are still active on Craigslist's international sites).

First, the bottom line. At the end of the day, Love146 is relieved that the world’s most popular virtual brothel has been "voluntarily" shut down by Craigslist (did you know that Craigslist gets more hits a day than Amazon.com? And yes, the Adult/Erotic services section was the most popular section of the site). However, I agree with the critics that the buck does not stop here. We can hardly lean back and gloat.

There has been much back and forth—and not a little division—about what impact these events will have on the anti-trafficking community's work to eliminate venues for trafficking for prostitution. There are activists on both sides--those who view this as a victory, and those who continue to believe that the elimination of the Adult Services section will make it more difficult for law enforcement to catch traffickers who sell women and children for sex.

In 2007, Love146 launched it's Craigslist “Call to Action” Campaign, which urged Craigslist to to “better monitor its Erotic Services section” and pro-actively prevent the sale and trafficking of children for sexual services. While we were initially thrilled at their response to set up a credit card verification system, Love146 ended up disappointed in Craigslist's overall attitude, that of heels dragging in the dirt and choosing only to respond to negative public pressure, rather than embracing the opportunity to be a web company who could truly help to lead the way in being a defender and abolitionist for victims of human trafficking.

It's now 2010, and Craigslist cannot feign ignorance of the facts: According to ECPAT-USA, approximately 100,000 U.S. children are forcefully engaged in prostitution or pornography each year. Additionally, the vast majority of the prostituted children in the U.S. are either runaways or abandoned children. Astonishingly, within the first 48 hours of being on the street, 1 in 3 children are lured into prostitution. Simply put, Internet has become the new marketplace for trafficking in children. The child sex industry is growing even as fewer prostitutes work the streets. This is because of the anonymity, relative safety, ability to easily lie about age, and low cost of using the Internet to set up appointments and transactions. The Internet has also allowed child sex trafficking to expand not only in large cities but into rural areas of the country.

The recent episode in the Craigslist controversy has helped to put the epidemic of human trafficking in the limelight again, and we should strike while the iron is hot. One response from Microsoft senior researcher Danah Boyd made the compelling statement that "we need to take this moment of visibility and embrace it, leverage it to create change, leverage it to help those who are victimized and lack the infrastructure to get help. What you see online should haunt you. But it should drive you to address the core problem by finding and helping victims, not looking for new ways to blindfold yourself." A noble rallying cry, to be sure.

Unfortunately, Ms. Boyd goes on to make a distinction between what she understands as consensual and non-consensual prostitution. She defends the so-called rights of "the low-end prostitutes who were using Craigslist to escape violent pimps. Keep in mind that occasionally getting beaten up by a scary john is often a whole lot more desirable for many than the regular physical, psychological, and economic abuse they receive from their pimps." Is this the level of freedom that is worth fighting for? Should women and children who have been oppressed and marginalized by their socio-economic status be FORCED to choose between occasional abuse vs. regular abuse?

There are many voices, even within the anti-trafficking movement, who would agree with Boyd, but I believe that her oversight in withholding the dignity of real choice from “low-end prostitutes”—the women and children who are most vulnerable to victimization—makes for a bleak future. Instead, we should lift up those "low-end prostitutes" equally as victims, as people who most likely began being victimized and abused from when they were adolescents, and to affirm that trading one form of abuse for another is simply not good enough.

The Craigslist controversy has helped us to understand that the real issue is not that of dividing those who want to protect victims of exploitation from those who want to protect free speech. Instead, it’s about understanding who are the exploited and who enables and allows that exploitation to happen. Craigslist’s Adult Services section enabled exploitation. Trading on the false sense of an equalized playing field enabled by an otherwise brilliant website, it caused some of the most vulnerable to be trafficked and sold as slaves. As modern-day abolitionists, let's make sure that we do not enable traffickers by settling for easy wins! We need to strive towards ever more creative solutions to eliminate human trafficking and address the aspects of our culture which enable the exploitation of women and children by collaborating with web companies, law enforcement, survivors, and our own communities.

Kathy Maskell

U.S. Prevention Advisor